A Reflection Of My Life

My experienced for IUI (intra-uterine insemination)

2011-05-08T18:32:00.003+08:00

Having this PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome) not as easy you might be thinking. I knew it painless but it almost killing me. Shoot a question like "Anak skang dah berapa?" or "Knp tak ada anak lagi" hurting and killing me the most. Ada juga certain people yang dont even know me well pastu throw me mean words like "Azy dah hilang naluri keibuan sebab tak ada anak lagi" this was what he told my other half and it was killing me the most untill now. Another thing when my colleague 24/7 asyik la cerita pasal anak la pasal her siblings yg nak getting pregnant la..baby on the way la..she keep on repeating again and again. If let say once in a while i just dont mind ni like everyday. Annoying gile!!! Kat rumah tak blh ke share the story dengan your other half.

The desire to get a baby by own sangat sangat tinggi. I did try few times had a conversation with my other half and closest friend but it won't help much but a trillion thanks to closest friend and my other half because trying to help and be there for me. Apologies for being extra sensitive. I cant stop thinking to get baby on my own. Its a stage of difficulties which totally I can't handle it anymore. You may have 1001 thinking about me but trust me its even tougher than what you ever think. For a these while memang saya struggle bersabar. But this time nak jumpa relatives pun rasa malas suddenly paranoid if people might asking me about anak. Sigh...

I am having my IUI (intra-uterine insemination) procedure last Wednesday. This procedure is a procedure used to help people who have been unable to conceive on their own become pregnant. Its consider painless and a very short procedure something similar to Paps smear. Its a procedure which was performed by threading a very thin flexible catheter through the cervix and injecting washed sperm directly into the uterus. During or after the IUI procedure you might have some of discomfort such as cramping and minor injury to the cervix that leads to bleeding or spotting. The whole process takes about 40minutes to 1 hours. The IUI process about 15 minutes and afterward you need to have rest about 40 minutes. After the IUI I had cramps on my right ovary, i think its where my mature follicles was release. A little bit difficult for me to walk and sit in the office.

I pray hard for having a successfully procedure. I hope if I can conceive and become pregnant and have such a healthy and beautiful baby on my own.

Kusut

2011-04-11T20:01:00.002+08:00

Lately ni rasa kusut semacam Banyak mengelamun...buat silap at work which was cost you some amount... terlajak....supposed fetched hubby at work tapi boleh plak tersampai rumah... tottaly demotivated. The desire yang mengatasi segala-galanya... I'm hopeless

Pregnancy Planning : Cycle 3 (Day 1)

2011-03-25T23:22:00.005+08:00

Tomorrow will start my day 2 and i might taking clomide 100mg since my follicles respond to that dosage. Waiting for my follicles size result on day 10 and day 13 Full tracking via ultrasound.

I need 110 % moral support from my bed mate.

I need like 1001 sweet memories and happy moment to have a lot of happy thought.

I need 10001 jokes to make me laugh and distress myself

I need a trillion one smile to fade all my sadness away.....

Its all I need at this moment.

From day 1 i knew the result was failed i wont have a tears in front of him. Pretend that I am strong enough to face this kind of situation. He saying that "Allah knows why" and dont be sad. "KITA PUNYA USAHA ALLAH PUNYA KUASA"

Mission : Failed

2011-03-23T21:23:00.003+08:00

My pregnancy planning cycle 2 was failed
Another frustration just begin...............

Pregnancy Planning (Cycle 2)

2011-03-09T21:10:00.004+08:00

Subfertility : 2years +
Clinical Diagnosis: PCOS
Drug Regiment : Clomid 100mg (Day 2 - Day6)
Estradiol (Day 2-Day14)

I have 3 perfect follicles size on my left ovary on my day 10, I was like 'wow bestnye'. On my day 14 I only have 1 perfect follicle on my right ovary (20mm x 25mm). Supposedly the doctor's required 2 but since I only have 1 she decided to break the follicle by giving me a shot. 36hours after the shot requires me to be with him (u know what i mean).

I really hope this cycle will succeed, I really don't want to go through to the next round with IUI or IVF things. I really don't know how to cope with this kind of failure since I struggle to conceive myself and went through like 1001 obstacles.

I really wanna have mine by my own. I can't bear with a full bag of envies looking at others with their baby on the way or they were already have. I wanna stop the feelings of menyusahkan everytime he send me up for medical appointment.

2011-03-03T19:11:00.002+08:00

Tomorrow will be my day 10 on my 2nd cycle. Hopefully the eggs will grow bigger than last time. I wanna have perfect size during my day 14.

Tips to spice up your love :

- recall all the sweets memories together such as
1. your first honeymoon.
2. The very first time he turns you on.
3. the sexiest thing he ever done for you.
4. your first kiss with him.
5. the best sex position.

Its all about happy thought. Trust me you will destress yourself and spice up your relationship.

Honeymoon Desert

2011-02-17T19:44:00.003+08:00

Agak-agak....if Im not a pregnant woman ada tak orang nak bawa I makan semua ni....

Look yummy la..........

Oh please.....

drooling~~~

My Giuliana Stories.....

2011-02-05T19:39:00.007+08:00

Fuhh~~Fuhh~~~
tiup skit dah berhabuk dah ni.....

I took an ages to updating my entry since the past 1 year.

What I want you guys to know that I am ongoing infertility treatment at Putrajaya Goverment Hospital which was recommended by hubby's cousins.
Since pregnancy is my desire so, I started the treatment in May 2010, it was quite very long procedure because i need to keep track my menses every month.

I'm having Policystic Ovarian Syndrome.
Patient with PCO disorder too much of male hormone (testosterone) from their ovaries.

The treatment begins with the mild fertility pills, taking clomid 50mg from day 2 to day 6 and day 10 need to scan how the follicles respond to the drugs and Day 14 to keep track whether your follicle meet the perfect size for fertilize.
This is my first cycle which is failed.

I need to add the dosage of drugs from 50mg to 100mg and if this cycle not successful need to change the dosage of clomid to 150mg. If ovulation not occurred on maximum clomiphene therapy then treatment with the injectable fertility drugs is usually more successful(I think this what Giuliana did in Giuliana and Bill, their first step to get pregnancy). Very the Giuliana OK. The injectable drugs are much more expensive and carry the risk of multiple birth.

Adoption is an option I always consider but I cant help myself, the desire of getting my own child. I believe most of the married couples have the same ideas as mine.

I dont know how many women out there deals with this kind of things but I'm not that strong enough to answer everytime people asking me such of questions. Especially time kat opis orang dok citer pasal anak 24/7. Serious. Migraine.
Ahahahhahahah!!!!!!
I'm trying to be honest on my entry ok.

Love ya~~

2010-12-25T22:35:00.001+08:00

Me in writing again....

very soon darling......

Life...

2009-11-12T10:01:00.004+08:00

I nearly gave up on my life this morning......every week ada je problem yang baru... Hoping for someone to pujuk me and comfort me... tapi hampeh.... pujuk diri sendiri....
again
and again....
and again....

Why I can't have what I really want???
I pray hard....
I do my best.....

If someone live their life happily every single day....please show me how?

Boleh ke someone offer me jadi my sunshine everyday???? Tired of being me.....

Suddenly I received this forward e-mail which is really made my day and made me think twice.

Life gives Answers in Three ways,
It says YES and gives Whatever u Want,
It says NO and gives u Something Better
It says Wait and gives u the Best

Happy???

2009-10-28T10:08:00.004+08:00

I always wonder if i could be happy again like before. I know everyday there are always have a chances to be better. Somehow I am stuck in my very own world.

I feel......
Nothing great of being me.
Tired of everything.
A lot of sacrificing.
A lot of pampering and comforting others.
Too much supporting others.

I really missed the old me. I am so confused. Is it because of the decision i have already made or it has been written. I thought can get my life happy in the end but its even tougher

Masalah tak pernah habis..........
ada je.........
and I am tired of being me........

Pelik tapi benar

2009-10-12T14:49:00.005+08:00

Ada 1 jenis spesies manusia yg memang keje dia menyakitkan hati orang ataupon mmg keje dia top up dosa diri sendiri dengan sakitkan hati orang lain. Tak cukup2 dari dulu menyakitkan hati. Terasa perangai mu macam Syaitan pun ada. Tolong la sesiapa beritahu dia yang saya dah tiada lagi dimuka bumi ini..........

Tolong la.....sebab saya rasa saya dah takde kena mengena dengan hidup kamu dan saya ini banyak sangat benda yang sangat dan perlu saya kisah kan.

Purposely private message sebab nak tunjuk yang diri kamu baik it wasn't a good idea because I'd never saw anything good in you. Tolong la berhenti berlagak innocent...nak muntah.......Kalau nak berlagak innocent pon tolong la jangan dengan saya.

OK....its even you were changed just keep it yourself la....mana la tau memang Allah dah buka kan pintu hati dia nak bertaubat.....but you don't have to tell the whole world and if you want to lantak la....bagitahu la sesapa except me.....I don't wanna know anything about you..... Letihla.....

If you were happy with your life lantak la......and if you not pon lantak la....ada ke i kisah????hmmmm.....boring kan orang macam ni????I pun agak bodoh dan jahil la sebab sudi berkawan dengan manusia spesies macam ni.......

Tolong la....kan dulu kamu sudah maki2 saya to back off from your life. Kan kamu sudah berjanji pada diri kamu yang kamu takkan mengenali diri saya. Apa lagi yang kamu mahu.......

Please somebody tell him that i am dead.......

Sigh~~~

ohhhhh~~~

Sigh again~~

Try..........

2009-09-29T09:08:00.002+08:00

A short conversation between A, B and C

A : In my life.....I always try my best....

B : But I think If you always try that's the best.....right??

C : Yeah.....everyday there's a chance to be better...... :)

11 Ramadhan....

2009-09-02T14:55:00.008+08:00

Lately ada bende yang best ada gak bende yg tak berapa nak best. Yang best nye last weekend dapat balik JB berbuka puasa bersama family Johor secara tak lansung dapat makan masakan mak yang sedap banget. Oh ya... masa balik JB hari tu my cousin and her FH followin g us to JB...Kenal kenal JB la kononnya.... Dapat jumpa justin....tp tak best sbb kejap sgt.....banyak bende nak borak tapi.....time sangat limited.....

Best jugak dapat pergi Danga bay....watching zoo at night....macam- macam ada tiger, elephant, horses, snakes (euuuuwww) and banyak lagi bende yang pelik2...memang la zoo tu agak kecil tapi best sebab mood berchenta kot..hahahhahah...sure korang muntah ....lepak santai dgn my love one....kalau single dulu lepak gedik santai la kan....skang ni kene behave sikit.......

Yang tak best plak terasa someone stabbing behind my back.. Sakit sebab tengah control untuk tak jadi pendendam.....Sebab saya tak layak menghukumi sesapa pun.....walaupun dia adalah org yang paling dekat dengan kita.....tatau apa motif dia berbuat sedemikian???cemburukah???cemburu dengan saya yang berusaha gigih???Serious rasa seperti teraniaya.......

Waiting for my sister, Iqah come to my house for her long weekend till Monday sebab Penang Monday cuti Nuzul Quran. Dia dah buat wish list dah nak makan apa for her buka puasa. Hubby might be busy this saturday for a few of appointment. I think i might be join him tapi tengokla....rumah macam disaster sempat kemas sikit2 je....takkan la nak tinggal kan Iqah sorang2 duduk rumah........

Kenapakah setiap hari adalah hari malas bagi saya?Perlukan suntikan rajin untuk aktif semula.......

6 Ramadhan

2009-08-27T12:08:00.003+08:00

Yesterday I had my chance to break fast with my family ayah, mak, qilah and nenek. Wah terasa sungguh seronot sekali. They were visited cik zali and stay at cik zali's place in Putrajaya.
Best sangat......dapat makan ayam golek, ikan bakar, murtabak rojak singapore, popiah dan mcm2 lagi la kuih muih yg tatau apa kenamanye.....

Siap sempat cut my youngest sister's hair......

Sangat takde hati nak keje......seriyes....cepat la semua ni berakhir....
rasa mcm dah tak larat sangat2
I really really cannot take it anymore.......

Love and Luck....
Can i have both more and more???
Please........I pray for it everyday.....
Yes... I really want it......I really wish for it.....

5 Ramadhan......

2009-08-26T10:56:00.004+08:00

Seriously....rasa memang takde mood nak keje sini dah........
waiting for my replacement...
Kalau ikutkan hati nak blah mcm tu je la kan...tp mcm kesian la plak.......
My heart not here anymore.......going somewhere else....
I'm not in the mood...
banyak sangat bende yang jadi within this month.....especially financial.....serious tak de mood.....kalau la boleh patah balik and make the right choice...kan ke bagus..... tapi what's have been done can't be undone......
Kalaulah ada orang yg boleh mendengar keluhan hati saya........
Kalaulah ada yang boleh meringankan bebanan yag saya tanggung.....
Kalaulah mereka tahu apa yang saya rasa........
Kalaulah ada sedikit kemanisan yang boleh melegakan hati saya.......
Kalaulah semua ni boleh berakhir sekelip mata.......

Semalam visit cik zali, kesian dia.....he was admitted kat ICU Hospital Serdang. He is too skinny...so weak..... Hopefully cepat la dia sembuh...Sangat tak sanggup melihat dia bersama wayar2 yang ada kat angota dia........
Kesian kat cik Jun(the wifey) jugak sebab dia pon tak berapa sihat tapi dia sangat tabah nak tgk suami dia sihat.......Pengorbanan si isteri......

Kat rumah dah sehari takde air......the whole apartment tu takde air.....without notice plak tu....gile tak????nasib baik la ada air yang saya tadah sebab tetibe je air kecik besar kecik besar....
tapi.....mcmana nak cuci baju ni......
masa ni la mengharapkan kalau la ada sungai kat depan rumah kan senang........

Waiting for a long weekend....nak balik jb this friday...maybe alyn and her fiance will be following us to JB jugak......

balik JB....
nak air kathira abu bakar.........
roti jala yang emak buat.......
murtabak yg besar tu.......
ayam percik jugak......

Semoga berjaya......tapi selalu kalau balik JB benda yg kita nak tu mcm payah sangat nak ada.......

Sehari sebelum Ramadhan......

2009-08-21T16:05:00.003+08:00

kadang kadang kita tak sedar....orang yang baik pun boleh jadi jahat, orang yang sangat jahat pon boleh jadi baik.....
Sebab tu bab menghukum orang berdosa atau pun tidak syurga atau pun neraka hanya Allah yang tentukan.

Sama juga macam rezeki kita tak boleh claim orang tu bodoh akan miskin selama-lamanya dan orang yang pandai itu boleh kaya selama-lamanya. Semua tu Allah yang tentukan.
Tapi...... sungguhpun begitu kita tak boleh lah berserah kepada Allah semata-mata.
Kena lah berusaha......
Berusaha sahaja tanpa doa dan minta dari Nya pun tak boleh juga.......macam mana nak dapat kalau tak minta........
Kalau berdoa siang malam pun tanpa usaha pun tak boleh juga.......kalau minta tanpa usaha mana lah datang nya hasil kalau tak berusaha....
Takkan lah yang bulat datang bergolek yang pipih datang melayang....
Mesti ada perih ada jerihnya......

Orang selalu nampak yang senangnya.....yang susah nya saya simpan sahaja di dalam hati.......
Time susah pun orang mengeji time saya senang pun ada orang tak senang hati.....

Tahun ni second year sambut Ramadhan bersama hubby....InsyaALLAH malam ni balik sekinchan.....sambut puasa kat sana, sama macam last year.....
Semoga ramadhan kali ni lebih bermakna dari tahun yang sebelumnya.....

Selamat menyambut puasa......

Good News!!

2009-08-13T13:58:00.006+08:00

Last Sunday (09.08.09 good number huh?) my dearly cousin, Nur Hazlyn got betrothed with her love one Hairul Zidi. The big day might be end of this year. Majlis adalah sangat meriah even its a last minute preparation. Just imagine the hantaran only started 1 day before the ceremony.

Yang paling best nye they only know each others for 3 weeks. Cinta pandang kedua. The story was like matchmaking plan and the idea was from me and my lovely hubby. huhuhuhu. tapi kita hanya merancang ALLAH yang Maha Pengasih dan Maha Penyayang yang menentukan. Alhamdulillah berjaya [terasa mcm the best match maker in town la plak]. Dah jodoh agaknya sebab segala perancangan adalah berjalan dengan lancar. So, this year I tought I only get new brother tapi dapat plak 1 new cousin. Can't wait for your big day.

The Hantarans......

secocok+sepadan=secodan

Finally she has the ring.

The Happy Family
Sungguh excited menuggu si dia...

Second good news plak my hubby's little fish dah dapat baby. Hahahahhaa......yesterday he was super sexcited told me the news. Baby fish pon baby fish la kan......Baby juga....hopefully lepas ni I plak dapat my own baby. hehehheheh.......

P/s to alyn & her FH :
Congratulation to you darling..Semoga sampai ke akhir hayat ye......Loads of love from me n hubby

ARrrghhhh......

2009-07-27T09:24:00.003+08:00

I have decided to quit from my current job. Tp Mr hubby said after raya or if in our xxxxx x account reaching our target....which is i'll tender my resignation letter end of next month.....
Lagi 2 hari pon gue dah rasa sengsar lagikan 2 month......If nak reaching our target terpaksa la berkerja keras ke arah itu....and as an understanding wifey me believe that we can do it....sabar azy sabar azy sabar azy.......

Adalah setiap hari terasa macam nak bunuh orang....Which I never felt like this before dalam bab bab kerja ni...rasa mcm nak suicide pon ada......
Maybe blog ini ada unsur2 luahan hati yang tak best.....Sebab terpaksa sabar dah menahan rasa nak bunuh orang......Terpaksa sabar demi orang yang di sayang....hua hua hua hua....

Oh ada good story.....but i cant tell you now.....when i do have some spare time i will update the good story ok???

Sempoi.........

2009-07-21T11:11:00.002+08:00

Smalam rasanya adalah hari yang agak penat walaupun tak buat apa-apa. My gentleman offer to cook for dinner. Best kan?? I love his fried rice tapi smalam adalah dinner makanan yang cepat dan mudah.

Lately dah rasa macam bosan nak keje. Bosan gile nak keje sini dah, nothing excites me anymore tapi ada suara-suara yang mengatakan at my age there's not a time for choosing a job nor jumping to another job sebab ia adalah pattern yang sama. makan gaji. pusing pusing itu je la. Kene cari oppurtunities utk generasi akan datang.

Tetibe dah terasa macam looser la plak sebab tak de 1 pon preparation untuk benda tu semua. nothing and Zero. Macamana nak buat? Kene activate plan lagi 1 as a back up plan. Adakah saya menjual karipap? sebab roomates aku kata dulu karipap aku best. hahahahaha....... tekak roomates aku sama ke mcm tekak org lain. ntah ntah org kata karipap aku rasa mcm sampah.

Akan difikirkan kemudian dan akan membuat 1 keputusan yang akan kejutkan semua orang espeacially emak dgn ayah. emak dgn abah sure geleng kepala.
aku?
buat bodoh sudah.......as long as i am happy...sure korang pon happy kot.....
ye ke?
hahahhahahhahaa.......terasa mcm evil la plak kan.....

Bila la aku nak jadi angel.......

Nasib baikla dapat mr hubby yang penyabar.....

aku adalah sedang mencari momentum diri aku ini dan self esteem yang tah mana mana tah larinya......mari mari cari......

huhuhuhuhuhuhu

When I craved for.......

2009-07-15T14:51:00.002+08:00

Finally dapat jugak makan kari kepala ikan. I was craved for it after me and my family went to Penang for sending my younger sister, Afiqah to Uitm Bukit Mertajam. Tapi Penang punya kari ada lain sikit...kesedapannya tak dpt di nafikan....memang sedap......menjilat jari.....
Yang best pasal Penang ialah kari dan jeruks nya......mmg la mcm pening tgk mak saya membeli belah jeruk sahaja.......tu pun ntah berapa kali nak patah balik.....kejap kejap hilang.... rupanya patah balik pi bli jeruk tu lagi....
ramai sangat kah kawan ayah dan emak???
kalau ramai pon...perlukah dia memberi semua sahabat handai dan saudara mara yang dia kenal???
Perlukah???
Ye lah aku pun kawan 2 3 ketul je.......
Neighbour depan rumah yang baru masuk 2 hari lepas jenguk muka pun belum.....
Pasti dia kelaparan setelah membau wangi kari kepala ikan ku semalam..........
huahuahuahua(evil laugh)
Okla lepas ni ada la orang yang aku nak pass pass makanan especially time puasa....

Moral Of the Story: "Sayang nanti kita pi Penang lagi ye????"

When my dearly friend got engaged

2009-07-06T10:00:00.002+08:00

I feel sangat happy even I can't make it to the day tapi saya sudah rasa bertapa gumbiranya hati kawan saya.
Adalah lebih excited saya menunggu hari yang betul-betul menukar statusnya sambil berdiskusi tentang preparation yang dia perlu ada semasa hari itu.
Wah~~gumbiranya........
tak sabar menunggu si manees ini naik pelamin

Congratulation Shabana Maneesa dan Syaiful....
Jangan tunggu lama-lama tau.......

HOW? SHOULD I?

2009-06-23T11:36:00.002+08:00

1. How did you handle when having a bad day? Bad mood? Bad people? Bad me?

2. Me always go for the wrong choices and now it is hurting me bit by bit. Nak diluah mati bapa nak di telan mati emak. I have this kind of situation. How to overcome all this? Should I start all over again? Should I lie to myself everyday?

3. Kita selalu tanya "Layakkah kau pada diri aku" tapi pernah ke kita tanya "Layakkah kita untuk dirinya?"

4. How you know when you were ready for everything?

Kuah dan nasi

2009-06-11T17:03:00.004+08:00

Yesterday I went to my dear cuzzy place.....after a few session of chit chatty and dinner we plan to hang out somewhere nearby their house. I really had a very good time with them. Having a good laugh is very therapy when you found your work tiring you.

I used to live with them while I was working in KL previously. While I stay with them Raihan (youngest brother) he was a young boy (still sekolah lagi pun) tapi sekarang telah mejadi seorang yang berjiwa sangat besar. I was impressed la sebenarnya, and now he's coming with his brilliant idea towards business and making money.
Gua memang tabik kat lu bro....... and I see a lil something inside of him.....in a good way la kan.....
Now i understand mana tak tumpah nya kuah kalau tak ke nasi....
ye la "nenek kami" seorang manusia yang tegar dalam mencari sumber sumber rezeki ni.....

Mungkin sebab dia adalah cucu "nenek tompok".

"Hidup cucu nenek tompok!!!!"

Cerita ikan Keli

2009-06-01T15:31:00.006+08:00

I went to market on Saturday morning, which is usually i do that on Friday evening sebab ada pasal malam. Sayur di pasar malam adalah sangat fresh dah n murah sebab ia bebas dari air-cond dan tidak di letakkan di dalam fridge.

On Saturday morning tu konon nya beli la ikan keli, teringin sangat nak makan ikan keli. Selalunya hubby yang selalu goreng ikan ni sebab tak ingin la aku nak g goreng ikan ni sbb mmg confirm meletop. tp mcm dah 2 3 kali goreng tu ingatkan la dah macam pro la kan....

"ala...meletop sikit2 je ni...boleh handle lagi ni"

baru masukkan ikan seketul nak masukkan lagi seketul tetibe meletop.....adekh~~~kene muka....baju.....

ikan yg memprotes untuk di goreng

you just imagine what if aku goreng ikan tu sambil berbogel bogel lan....atau pon separuh bogel....memang confirm....cleavage aku melecur....

At first tak sakit...tapi lama2 pedihnya......then he put some ice on my face....sedihnya.....i put some Bio oil on my face....hopefully hilang la scars tu....

Habis la muka ku cacat.....

Sekali tengok macam kena belasah dgn laki....boleh buat drama ni....hhahaha!!!!

Annoucement to my housemate a.k.a bedmate a.k.a roomate
Lepas ni if you wanna have some ikan keli sila lah goreng sendiri ataupun kita bli di kedai yang sudah di masak sahaja....lebih selamat

Sekian Terima Kasih

Monday again......

2009-06-01T08:38:00.004+08:00

1. Monday is my unproductive day....
2. Having a very bored Sunday.
3. Lat Saturday I'd burned my face while frying fish for lunch.
4. Cant wait to balik kampong....(Boleh tak kalau balik terus and tak payah balik sini lagi???)
5. I knew it almost a year but, Can I just giving up as simple as that???
6. Nothing to do with others. Its me. Just me.
7. Macamana nak keluar ni with my burned face.

Yuna - Dan Sebenarnya

2009-05-28T15:32:00.001+08:00

Oh Bulan..
Enggan melayan diriku lagi
Pabila airmata membasahi pipi
Dan lagu lagu di radio seolah olah memerli aku
Pabila kau bersama yang lain
Adakah perasaan benci ini sebenarnya cinta
Yang masih bersemadi untukmu
Dan sebenarnya ku mengharapkan di sebalik senyumanmu itu
Kau juga menyintai aku
Ku enggan berpura pura ku bahagia
Ku enggan melihat kau bersama si dia
Oh ku akui cemburu
Mula menular dalam diri
Pabila kau bersama yang lain
Adakah perasaaan benci ini sebenarnya cinta
Yang masih bersemadi untukmu
Dan sebenarya ku mengharapkan
Di sebalik senyuman mu itu
Kau juga merindui aku
Pabila kau merenung matanya
Ku rebah jatuh ke bumi
Di saat kau benar-benar mahu pergi
Seperti ku bernafas dalam air
Adakah perasaaan benci ini sebenarnya cinta
Yang masih.. bersemadi untukmu
Dan sebenarya ku mengharapkan D
i sebalik senyuman mu itu
Kau juga merindui aku

Oh...
Dan Sebenarnya .. Dan Sebenarnya .. Aku rindu ..
Dan Sebenarnya .. Dan Sebenarnya .. Aku tak mampu .. tanpamu..

News

2009-05-27T16:45:00.003+08:00

I received some of very good news for past 2 days

1. Emak and Abah get their chance going to Mekah menunaikan rukun haji yg ke-5. Hubby said emak was crying and abah was like happy semacam je. They was really excited.

2. Alhamdulillah....Hubby's business is going well. hubby and his friends business centre will be open very soon and new programme will be launch officially by KPM very very soon which is next month on 24.

3. time to balik kampung.....Sangat la teruja kerana sudah lama tak balik kampong halaman terchenta.......(chewah kampung ke?) Rindu mak ayah kawan kawan adik adik........mcm la boleh cuti lama.....dah terbayang dah apa nak makan time balik johor nanti...

Have you heard botok-botok? Damn Sedap......Dia banyak vegies kat luar pastu gotta fish inside the daun2 dan dibungkus dengan daun pisang....ntah apa ke nama tah daun tu....banyak sangat......Tapi kalau guna ikan tenggiri amatla settap.....saya boleh habis kan 2 bungkus tanpa dimakan dengan nasi.......kalau tak pedas sangat la.....kalau tak tahu apa itu botok-botok sila lah view pict di bawah....

Memang nampak pelik......tapi rasa dan aroma daun pisang nya....mampu meneteskan air liur....

ahahhahah!!!!!!

Saya yang telah di tagged oleh Amy

2009-05-20T15:21:00.004+08:00

1)Bekas kekasih saya adalah..
X-file

2)Saya sedang mendengar..
Bunyi air cond

3)Mungkin saya patut..
Meet Miss J yang lama menghilangkan diri

4)Saya suka..
Bila kekasih hati berjoget joget keriangan ahahahhhaa

5)Sahabat sahabat saya...
Layankan je saya ni yang kekadang ntah apa apa

6)Saya tak paham..
Lelaki yg kaya pastu kasi cerai the wife who has being loyal to them yang sanggup susah payah pastu g kawen ngan pompuan yg kononnya cantek tp sebenarnya plastic semata2.

7)Saya kehilangan..
apa ek???

8)Ramai yang berkata..
Saya dah gemuk sbb happy tapi sebenarnya saya terpaksa habis makanan yg saya masak sebab takut membazir

10)Cinta itu adalah..
Mystery

11)Di suatu tempat,seseorang sedang..
missing her friends and family in Johor

12)Saya akan cuba..
dan cuba lagi untuk menghadiahkan kekasih saya seorang anak....ahahhahhhaha

13)Ayat SELAMANYA membawa maksud..
takde titik

14)Telefon bimbit saya..
My essential

15)Bile saya terjaga..
Make sure kekasih hati ada kat sbela

16)Saya paling meluat..
perempuan plastic

17)Pesta/parti adalah..
hampir pupus dlm kamus hidup saya sejak setahun ni la

18)Haiwan yang paling comel penah saya temui..
kucing yang tetibe melompat ke atas riba saya apabila saya sedang makan dan hampir terbalik meja makan di rumah ibu kekasih saya

19)Peringkat umur yang paling menyeronokkan saya ialah..
20

20)Hari ini..
Saya kenyang sangat

21)Malam ini saya akan..
berdua sahaja di rumah dengan kekasih saya (kalau dia tak kuar la)

22)Esok pula saya akan..
pujuk kekasih saya nak ajak dating tak pun g jmp Miss J

23)Saya betul2 inginkan..
Baby boy (sound desperate tak?)

24)Ketika anda lihat wajah anda di hadapan cermin pagi ini..
Blurr sbb ngantuk

25)Pusat membeli belah atau arked permainan..
tempat yang semakin jarang saya kunjungi sebab kemelesetan ekonomi....ehehehheheh

26)Makanan barat atau jepun..
2 2 saya suka....as long as takde babs

27)Bilik yang terang atau gelap..
Terang bila saya sorang gelap bila dengan kekasih hati. jeng jeng jeng...ehehehhehe

28)Makanan segera adalah..
Senang tak yah nak berfikir panjang

29)Ayat terakhir yang anda akan katakan pada seseorang..
perlu ke???

30)Siapa yang anda ingin tag..
1. shasha
2. Jort
3. Shaleen
4. Azie-Naziehah
5. Ain Nazira (sila buat di blog kamooo)

Alam Semula Jadi

2009-05-18T16:29:00.004+08:00

Saya mmg takut kucing....

Dan juga haiwan haiwan yang mempunyai kuku yang tajam dan kulit yang sangat licin seperti ular.....bila melihat ular secara live adakalanya saya terasa ingin terkenc.....

Maybe because saya dibesarkan dengan keluarga yg tak suka kucing dan saya sangat la pemalas nak kasi cuci muntah dan najis-najis yang mencacatkan pemandangan mata saya. Bulu kucing juga membuat muka saya berjerawat....I dont know why....but its true....

Rasa mcm seram je kucing tu mencakar saya....atau pun menerkam saya......but hamster in the other hands....senang nak mandi....pastu tak la dia kuar dr cage dia....najis2 dia pon hanya di dalam cage dan tidak lembek...yeck!!!ataupun ikan ke.....senang sket kan.....

Sangat berbeza dengan hubby....he loves animal......he can watch discovery channel tu day and night.......

2 perkara yg dia sangat minat dan obses tapi saya tak berapa minat ialah

1. haiwan

2. sejarah

2 perkara yg saya sangat suka dan obses tapi dia tak minat ialah

1. Romantic movie

2. Durian dan Petai

I'll yawning and fall asleep while watching discovery channel Tapi kekadang tu excited la konon konon....nak ambik hati....walaupun kekadang dia tak layan dengan soalan-soalan yang mungkin menggangu kosentrasi beliau. Tapi saya tak pernah bosan untuk mengacau dia sampai dia yang naik bosan.......hehehehhehe~~~~
Setakat ini belum pernah lagi la makan petai di rumah... Durian i ever asked him bought it once. Tu pun dah sangat craving nak makan durian.
Dia Kata kalau saya makan petai silalah membuang di public toilet yang berhampiran. Public toilet yang berdekatan ialah Stesen minyak Esso. Tapi perlukah saya ? ehheheheh~~~~Nasib la......sapa suruh tak suka

...................

2009-05-08T08:35:00.003+08:00

I don't know why i felt this way.....
anxious....
worried.....
Sometimes my hands numb....
and sometimes my leg were killing me....
I am trying to figure out why i have this uneasy feeling......
Trying my best putting it at ease.
Am I Dying or something???

Ya Allah.............

2009-04-27T08:27:00.001+08:00

Maka hari yang tension akan bermula.....
bosannya...........

Hairy

2009-04-24T21:37:00.005+08:00

Jika lelaki berbulu di dada adalah sangat biasa dan ada kata nampak manly....tetapi.............................

Jika wanita berbulu di dada...apakah????

Hehehehehhe~~sangat la scary

Happy weekend darling

Lemak manis

2009-04-21T16:38:00.007+08:00

Lately saya suka sangat makan mangga muda. There's one type of mangoes yang mentah tapi manis. Bila saya makan lunch seorang saya akan pergi menyinggah membeli mangga itu. .

Mentah, Rangup dan manis. Tapi apabila ia masak akan menjadi sangat sangat melampau manis nya.

Selalu saya dapat makan beberapa slice sahaja. Sangat la tidak puas so, I've decided to find it in Pasar Malam Sungai Bertik dan sukacita nya saya dapat membeli mangga itu dengan harga yang sangat2 murah siap orang tu bagi extra lagi. Sangat la puas hati tetapi minggu lepas daya minta abang penjual itu mencari yang mentah dia terbagi yg masak plak. Tapi bedal je la kan.....sedap juga tapi saya prefer yang mentah.

Di tempat kerja saya hanya makan beberapa slices yg berharga RM1.50 tetapi setelah saya berjumpa dengan mangga kegemaran saya saya blh makan berkilo kilo lagi sebab sangat murah RM3 sekilo.

ini lah mangga lemak manis yg masak

masak atau mentah sama sahaja rupa nya kan????sebab itu memerlukan khidmat abang penjual tapi dia pun fail jugak.
Saya suka juga pulut mangga tapi sejak gastric ni mengada-ngada sakit nye so, kene la berpantang makan pulut.

Yummy yummy~~~~

Seremban Part 2

2009-04-14T21:52:00.016+08:00

We having our dinner at Princess Water front, port Dickson.

The food really nice. Since just 2 of us i just odered siakap steam fish and kerabu sotong(makanan kegemaran kekasih hati saya).

Yang tinggal hanyalah tulang dan sampah sarap yang tidak boleh diterima oleh tekak.

Muka seorang yang sangat kelaparan.........and always ready for dinner.

Aksi-aksi kekenyangan selepas mambaham seekor ikan yang besar.

Gaya hisap rokok ala ala cowboy...

muka happy selepas mencekik...

And the unlightened lattern...Ironic....
If you plan to go to Port dickson. Try not to miss the 'Pasar Malam' on Saturday night. You might like it. A lot of food, fresh fish, squid, prawn and fresh fruits.

Owh ya~~what did i do 1hour without light to support earth hour? My answer is....bercengkerama di bawah bulan purnama di tepi pantai yang gelab......hihihihihhihihi.......

Seremban Part 1

2009-04-14T20:49:00.010+08:00

Remember my previous entry me saying that went to seremban for traditional treatment for me getting baby. We headed to seremban from house 6.30 and reached Seremban at 7.30am then get the number...and we got no 51 out of 60. Boring gile.....meanwhile waiting for my turn, me rang kak ayang for a visit her new baby born. Let me introduce you Aiman...

Cute kan???giler punya cute...He's damn cute till i forgot to snap the mother's picture.Heheheheh......

At 1pm we reached again to the pakcik house and continue waiting for our turn and the pakcik said there's nothing wrong with us. Kalau ada rezeki adala ye.....

After the treatment session we plan to stay at Seremban for one night. Nak recall memory silam gitu....Seremban is so much different. What I can say is Banyak Pokok. Its so unbelievable.

View from my hotel room....

Lepak kat balcony and having a cup of tea made by the one I love....cool kan????

My Yummy Drink

2009-04-14T20:44:00.004+08:00

Let me introduce you my yummy drink. Mangosteen + Apple drink. Yummy....Tak caye???try la sedap tau....Walaupun tidak ditambah gula tapi ia cukup cukup manis dan sebab itulah saya tambah dengan air masak...hihihihihihih

Weekends

2009-04-03T10:56:00.003+08:00

Tak sabarnya nak menyambut hari cuti. Tapi kelihatan setiap minggu pun ada aktiviti. Saturday might be going to a friend of hubby's house. Kenduri Kesyukuran dan juga house warming. pastu accompany him pergi main paintball.

Sangat bersemangat menyambut hari minggu...

Happy weekend Laling.....
muahhhss

Responsibilies.....

2009-03-27T23:22:00.003+08:00

I really dont understand to a particular someone who is related to my bedmate.
What happened?
Ok let me tell you this.......
For you not to help your family members. Its ok.
Asked my bedmate to help his family while he moved to new house. Its ok.
For your father who was saying 'menyusahkan pakcik-pakcik'. Its ok
For you buat bodo je bila family members ada masalah. Its ok
Asked my bedmate to help his father while your beloved father lost in town. Its ok

But..................responsibilities

Asking my bedmate suruh hantar pegi rumah sedara yg lain dan suruh sedara tu pegi hantar mak kau seeing Doctor for appointment. It's NOT OK for me and i repeat ITS NOT OK
apa guna kereta kau dan diri kau yang muda dan sihat kalau bukan nak tolong mak sendiri.
Sigh~~~
Please..........Stop burden us. Tolong la..... I need my bedmate more at home. With me. Beside me.

Ni kira macam entry nak maki la juga.

She's your mother la......Sigh again......

My hour

2009-03-27T22:03:00.002+08:00

I might be going to Seremban tomorrow to get a traditional massage for us having a baby. chewah~~Plan to visit my ex-roomies kak ayang and her new born baby boy and might stay in Seremban for a night.
I need a space just me and him. It sounds desprate. Yes I do.
For all these day always for a family la, career la others la.....
Tu pun macam susah.......and he asked me "Nak berapa lama kat sana?" and for me it sounds boring....
Kenapa tak rasa macam berchenta dulu ek.....

Desprately need the sparks, the flame and na na na na na.....

what you gonna do without a light in an hour? hmmmm...interesting tu.....update you later ya...

have a fabulous weekend darling~~~

Excuses department

2009-03-26T09:28:00.003+08:00

I made complaint to XX net company since last week till last Tuesday. Everytime I follow up the progress report they said the technician this la that la and i'm sick of so many excuses they made plus the boss keep on saying this and that. So, my suggestion is CUSTOMER SERVICE department change to EXCUSES department. Baru la kena kan.

Aduhhhhhh~~pening kepala nak menjawab.

entry mama bosan

2009-03-24T21:46:00.003+08:00

Bosan bosan dan bosan

dah dia kata sibuk nak buat macamanakan.

Laksa Asam

2009-03-17T10:06:00.005+08:00

Sampai hari ni saya tatau nak bezakan laksa asam and laksa penang laksa kedah or laksa utara. For me rasa dia sama je..... Sesiapa yang laksa's fan inilah resipi untuk semua

Bahan A
3 biji bawang besar
belacan
3/4 liter air

Bahan B
4 / 5 ekor ikan mabong / kembong batu

Bahan C
Daun kesum di hiris halus
Bunga Kantan dihiris halus
3 sudu besar cili kisar
4 keping asam keping
Garam secukup rasa

Bahan Hiasan
Daun selom (dihiris halus)
timun (dihiris panjang dan halus)
Cili Padi ( dihiris halus)
Bawang besar (Dihiris halus)
Telur Rebus (di belah 2)

Bahan B di rebus sehingga masak, di buang segala tulang dan duri ikan dan kemudian dikisar sehingga sangat halus. Bahan A dikisar dan direbus sehingga mendidih. Masukkan Bahan C tunggu hingga mendidih.

Setelah mendidih masukkan Bahan B yang telah dikisar dan setelah agak pekat bolehlah dimatikan api

Untuk laksa basah rendam 5minit dengan air panas yang telah mendidih.
untuk laksa kering hendaklah di rendam lebih kurang 10jam barulah boleh di rebus

Kuah Laksa yang di masak boleh la dihidangkan bersama bahan hiasan.

Gambar Hiasan

Yiippie~~~

2009-03-12T13:49:00.002+08:00

Congratulations to my younger sister, Afiqah who received her SPM result. 6A1 and the rest all B's. Now she waiting for us to come back to JB. Ada la tu hajat di hati....kuikuikuikui~~~~

Kismis Doa

2009-03-05T11:36:00.004+08:00

I bought raisin doa last tuesday since its good for your brain and what I found is doa' sticker inside of the box. I wonder why they called it kismis doa'.

Adakah kismis yg telah didoakan. but how they did?

or

Kismis yang ada sticker doa kat dalam

or

hanyalah branding name sahaja.

Soalan yang saya tak dapat jawapan.....

Hantu?

2009-03-03T16:45:00.003+08:00

Ada ke patut?
Dulu masa kecik2 kalau nak main kat luar time panas buta slalu orang orang tua tak bagi sebab takut kene sorok dengan hantu tetek.

Bila cakap kat hubby kan he said tetek dia labuh sampai boleh sangkut kat bahu. ridiculous. ntah btul ntah idak. tapi yang confirm aku tak caye la sebab aku adalah manusia yang selalu main time tengah hari buta masa kecik dulu pastu takde pon kene sorok antu tetek.
penipu la makcik makcik ni.

Elevator

2009-02-25T21:01:00.003+08:00

Apabila nak masuk ke dalam elevator aku akan mengecilkan sedikit mata aku and muka macam cuak cuak sikit. The truth is.....memang lah diri ku ini fobia naik elevator kerana tangan ku yang cantik ini pernah tersepit di pintu elevator itu.

Adalah sangat seram di suatu tengah hari bersama Miss J di dalam elevator dan bercerita tentang hantu tak keluar waktu siang kemudian secara tiba-tiba pintu elevator itu terbuka and no one came in. Muka ku hanya selamba tetapi terdengar suara Miss J kata "Sapa kata siang siang 'dia'takde. Wah gelabah la aku kan.....kerana diriku memang la penakut yang amat. Sejak dari itu aku pergi ke rumah Miss J mestilah ditemani tunangku(kini dah jadi hubby) sampai la depan pintu umah dia....dan macam macam la aku dengar cerita pasal elevator. Spooky siot...

My Weekend

2009-02-25T09:05:00.003+08:00

Kak Nor was came to Klang last Saturday and we met each others at JUSCO Bukit Tinggi with my lovely hubby(tu pun terpaksa sbb afterward plan to balik Sekinchan)
She came to Klang twice but this time I won't disappoint her by not to see her. Some we just flashing back what we went through pass out on PWB. Hehehe cam klaka laka la plak. The best part is gossip....kui kui kui....

Can't wait for the next meet up.

Balik Kampong my dearly hubby kene buli ambik kelapa muda. kui kui kui

Being YOU

2009-02-24T09:01:00.002+08:00

How to figure out to love being yourself? Being happy with yourself the way you look or your body?The most important person in your life is "YOU". No matter what

"YOU" are the one person you have to spend every waking moment of your life with.
"YOU" are the only person who will be there for you when no one else is.
"YOU" are all you have no matter what.

What does 'Loving yourself' means?

BEING AWARE
Knowing who you are, how you act, what you believe, and why you think certain ways. Knowing your boundaries, strengths and weaknesses.

BEING VALUABLE
Recognizing your own worth and the validity of your opinions. Providing value to others because you tap into your individual talents.

BEING YOUR OWN BEST FRIEND
Liking, respecting, and trusting yourself. Treating yourself well. Taking care of your needs.

BEING ASSERTIVE
Confidently expressing your unique "I" in the world. Being proactive rather than reactive and staying true to yourself.

BEING COMMITTED
Acting in accordance with your personal development or spiritual growth. Making "growth" your number one priority.

BEING SELFISH (or SELF-MINDFUL)
Respecting yourself and not tolerating disrespect from others. Neither sacrificing yourself to others, nor letting others sacrifice themselves to you.

BEING RESPONSIBLE
Knowing that you are ultimately responsible for all outcomes in your life, positive and negative, and that you alone make the choices which create your experience.

BEING HAPPY ALONE
Enjoying your own company and using solitude for nourishment to reboot your energy. That way you can share love without getting depleted.

All you have to do is FIRST LOVE YOU and everything else will fall into place.

As Samantha said to her boyfriend Jerry Smith in SEX AND THE CITY The Movie
"I love you but I Love Myself more"

Looser

2009-02-19T21:37:00.004+08:00

Patut ke ada org tinggalkan statement macamni
"Kiteorang kuar pergi mencari kejayaan"
"Harap kiteorang tak ganggu **a*"
habis aku yg dok kat rumah sesorang ni mencari kecelakaan la ke?
Tetibe aku rasa mcm nak balik JOHOR TERUS.....
%^#%#%&^*&(*($%#$@

Janji

2009-02-19T20:42:00.005+08:00

Janji.
Semua orang berjanji dan kadang kadang tu aku rasa mcm senang je orang campak janji is like you feeding a fish campakkan sahaja ataupun mcm menggoreng keropok lekor hanya campakkan sahaja di dalam kuali.

Macam macam aku jumpa orang yang berjanji itu ini. Maybe he / she try to sugar coat the other party tapi tatau ke mereka kalau diorang mungkir janji really made us really heart sick.

Bila diungkit apa yang di janji perkataan yang selalu keluar daripada orang yang berjanji tu ialah "Maaf" tak pun "Sorry". Dulu aku rasa perkataan tu rasa macam berharga sangat tapi sekarang ni aku rasa macam kosong je perkataan tu mcm kosong je.

Ada hamba Allah tu, everytime dia contact aku mesti cakap benda-benda yang lepas yang dia dok janji kat aku. Dah rasa macam letih nak dengar tapi aku gagahkan la telinga aku nak dengar semua tu. Look....I have my my life. My new life. You have your own life even better than what I had right now. Pastu hutang aku plak tu buat bodo je la kan....and kau bercerita jugakla pasal diri kau yang baru balik dr overseas for vacation...agak celaka jugak la. Takkan la aku nak menebalkan muka nak minta kan. Plus aku rasa aku dah minta banyak kali.
Hmmmm....
tatau la....
manusia manusia
Yang aku kisah bukan duit tapi Janji. Dia tak penat ke asik berjanji sebab aku dah penat nak dengar janji janji dia.

Missing

2009-02-18T22:17:00.004+08:00

After work me feel very starving so, hubby decide to take me out for dinner since he already having his dinner and my sister in-law having her class until 10pm. Me having the best yong tau foo soup in Klang. Its remind me of my hometown in JB. The best yong tau foo in Kampung Melayu Majidee the soup is tastylicious and the homemade chili sauce damn nice. The best thing it is very cheap. I just love it.

I think I miss my hometown. I miss my family in Taman Rinting, Family Senai and also kak zana, hanim kechik, kak nor, Justin and Iwan.

The twins called my husband today she said abah asked us to balik Sekinchan. I think abah miss little alia and his children.

There a few things will happened within this year some are having a new boyfriend, some will get betroth, some will get married, some were married within this 2 month and some will expecting a baby. What ever things happen makes you feel happy and me also happy for you. Wish you lots of LOVE will come around you.

Ayam goreng berempah

2009-02-17T15:27:00.003+08:00

1 ekor ayam sederhana besar

10 ulas bawang putih

1 inchi halia

sebatang serai

1 sudu cili giling (jika suka pedas 2 atau 3 sudu)

tepung beras/tepung goreng serbaguna(kentucky)

gula dan garam (ikut rasa)

Cara-cara

Ayam dipotong mengikut saiz yg di gemari. Bawang putih, halia dan serai ditumbuk atau dikisar. Bahan yang telah dikisar dicampur bersama cili giling, gula dan garam kemudian digaul bersama ayam dan diperap selama 1 atau 2 jam. Setelah di perap masukkan tepung kentucky / tepung beras dan boleh la di goreng dan dihidang panas.

lingerie

2009-02-17T10:42:00.008+08:00

me : naseb baik sayang takde $ kalau tak habis sayang saya paksa bli sexy lingerie ni

him: mana?

me: (pointing at the magazine)

him: kenapa pulak?

me : ye la to accomplish azam tahun ni. Sexy lingerie and you drooling when look at me on it

him : (menyengih)

No one ever perfecto~~

2009-02-16T21:54:00.006+08:00

I love to see everything beautiful. Same goes to woman i mean is beautiful woman. A friend of mine MISS J said there's no 1 perfect. She tried to compare 3 of us me, her and MISS E (As E stand for Engineer) she said " I am beautiful, have a very good feature but I'm fat, you (me) beautiful but a little bit short and her (Miss E) very beautiful but a little bit skinny". She's right and it doesn't means i tend to love same genital as mine (fuhh~~minta simpang) it just love to see them. Sangat admirer to see a woman who are beautiful and had a fabulous life. Why I never be like them. How can I change my life? Takdir memang kita tak boleh, yang kita boleh ubah nasib.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
But how???

Big HUGss on my V-Day

2009-02-15T13:08:00.016+08:00

Thank You....

To hubby because let me celebrate the V-days with my best girlfriend.
Send me here and there just for me to have fun. Really appreciate that.
For sailing my love boat for all these years.
For completing my life.

To my girls for your time, laugh, fun and all those things that we've spend together.
Love to be love by you girls.
Really love to get a gift by you darling.
Love Love Love Love

Love Fact

2009-02-14T01:17:00.004+08:00

Ginger Love

If you wanna make sure that you and your spouse have a good time, everytime? Keep supply of ginger at home! When the pungent aroma of his zesty spice hits our olfactory system signals are sent to our brain to raise our blood pressure, resulting in blood vessels admitting a flow of blood to our genitals. Whether you take ginger in your soup, tea or in your sushi, ginger revs your metabolism which can get your whole body humming with renewed sexual energy

Best Flirt

The best way to flirt with a guy is to ignore him. Once you both exchange that look and you both understand there's chemistry...so, start ignoring him.

Save your beautiful curve

2009-02-12T20:44:00.004+08:00

**Stand in front of miror. Inspect both breast for dimpling or changes in shape, size and skin texture.

** Squeeze each nipple to check for discharge

**Lie down. Press tips of right fingers on left breast. Move in circles from outer edge to nipple to feel for lumps under skin and armpit area. Repeat on right breast.

Akan Tiba -Alif OIAM

2009-02-05T21:33:00.003+08:00

Hey hati ku..
Selalu mendambakan cinta
namun tak kunjung tiba
Hatimu itu
Seperti apa yg ku mahu selama ini

Am Em
Ertikanlah pagi ku yg kaku tanpa kamu

C/o
Kau ku cinta
Engkaulah yg ku puja
Tertunggu selama ini takku jumpa
Dgn mu ku di lamun indah
Ku harap cinta akan tiba di hati kita..

Lihat kamu
Tak ku sedari
Waktu dh mulai tinggalkan ku
Kau kau kau
Buatku lupa mengapa ku disini pada mulanya..

Ertikanlah malam ku yg sayu dingin tanpamu

Setiap hari bersama mu
Ku ingin selalu dekatmu
Ku hitung saat dan waktu
Hingga hari esok kembali lagi

ulang C/o
Hingga hari esok kembali lagi

Lelaki memang pelik

2009-02-05T11:27:00.004+08:00

me : Sayang, what if situation A happened ek? What your advice?
him : Lantak la....yang awak nak menyibuk kenapa...

me : (dalam hati. dah agak dah sure dia nak ckp mcm tu kan)

Kenapa lelaki macam tu ek? Most of men will give the same answer.Maybe sebab dia takut kalau dia buat mcm tu and ada orang nampak and dia bagi tau kat kita.

Masalahnya bila kita bergossip dgn orang lain, after the kepohchee conversation sibuk plak nak tau and bila kita jawab adala mula la dia buat muka tak puas hati. Macam dia tak nak missed the HOTZ tapi indirectly. Baik dia join je terus instead of hiding behind the wall and menelinga.

Hmmmm...bukan perempuan je pelik tau. Lelaki lagi pelik.

How Arrr?????

2009-02-04T23:13:00.005+08:00

A Situation
What will you do when you saw your best girlfriend's boyfriend went out with a girl. They were like on a date. The girl wore something like who waiting for the guy to purpose her.

The first person you will tell is your boyfriend and for damn sure the boyfriend will throw all the positive situation something like 'maybe they were on business meeting dah la....jangan campur hal orang la...you just do your thing sudah la'
Will you keep it as a secret and just let them be OR tell your best girl what was happened.

B Situation
A friend of yours that you know for a year is in relationship with your ex-files who dumped you for another girl / guy. You and your ex were ended your relationship for last 3 years and lost in touch. Suddenly your friend introduce you their love one and she / he was from your ex-files. As far as you know your ex-file, she / he really a bad girl / guy. What will you do? Cross your finger on your mouth for the sake of friendship? Or tell her / him, maybe he/she accuse you are jealous for their relationship and will ruining out your friendship?

Ehhhmmm.....

ntah ek....

wa tatau la....

Ain Nazira

2009-02-02T22:24:00.004+08:00

Congratulation to my sister Ain Nazira on her engagement (26th Jan 2009) with her fiance' Mohd Amin. Finnally she's step on another stage being single but not available.

For Love Or Money?

2009-02-02T22:10:00.006+08:00

Soalan 1

Duit ke cinta? Duit itu adalah sangat perlu untuk sustained your love. Ye la..

Situasi 1

Masa berchenta, macammana nak pergi berchenta. At least watching movie pun you need money.

Takkan la all the time aweks yang nak kene blanja kan. Lama lama aweks pun fed up.

Unless la the girlfriend own of a company. Tapi....you need money still

Situasi 2

Masa Kawin, mcmana nak bayar bil yang berlambak lambak (kete, credit card, rumah,etc etc etc ) . Tak blh settle semua ni blh buat gaduh apa. Takkan la hari-hari nak makan nasi goreng. kan kan kan?????

Soalan 2

Kebahagiaan bersama orang yang di cintai atau kebahagiaan bersama orang yang boleh memberi kesenangan?

Katakanlah kita pilih orang yang boleh memberi kesenangan and 1 find day lah dengan kuasa Allah kesenangan itu ditarik balik.

Will you stay?

Sebab kita bahagia sbb dia bagi kita kesenangan maknanya kalau dia memberi kita kesusahan kebahagiaan tu hilang bersama dengan kesenangan yang dipinjamkan Allah. Plus kalau kita bersama orang yang tak dicintai mcmana nak jadi kite nye bedmate and spend all day long the rest of your life.
Sama juga la dengan rupa paras. Kalau kita pilih yang cantik pun katalah nanti Allah tarik nikmat cantik. Will you stop loving her/him? Takut zuriat rupa paras tak elok? Itu kan kerja Allah. Dia yang tentukan semua tu.

So, basically yang saya lihat adalah kesederhanaan dan keikhlasan bukan kerana sesuatu perkara yang dipinjamkan.

**Topic ni cedok idea dr my cuzzy Alyn**

20 October means...

2009-01-16T23:12:00.002+08:00

You are prudent, circumspect and take things seriously.= (When it too much people might think you are so...cerewet)

Before you make any move, you will think of a few alternatives that might take a while. = (absolutely true and now am stucked)

You are patient, imaginative and target oriented.

You value friendship more than anything else. = (I only have quality friends and it getting lesser...sedihkan???)

Your Love, You usually study your partner carefully before making any move. = (Mestilah...kalau main sebat je kalau orang tu bapak ayam camner)

You never demand anything beyond the natural quality of that person.

Your sincerity doesn't bring excitement in your love life but it brings deeply grown relationship. = (ye la kot sbb tu aku kawin dengan dia because of sincerity)

Tak Best La Bila....

2009-01-16T22:35:00.002+08:00

===rasa macam malas nak buat apa apa especially memasak
===rasa bosan makan masakan sendiri
===craving benda yang bukan bukan (dont get me wrong eh bukan mengidam)
===muka banyak kuar pimple
===asik kene tinggal sorang dekat rumah
===check job vacancy requirement dia kene tau mandarin
===sensitif sangat asyik nak sentap je apa orang cakap
===kita ingat kat orang tu tapi bila kita rasa mungkin orang tu menyampah kita
===asyik fikir benda negative
===rasa macam nak baling semua benda
===tgk muka orang darah darah kat TV pasal peperangan kat Palestin
===kat ASTRO asik citer yang sama je setiap hari
===bila takde keje dan takde duit

P/S : Sila abaikan perkara perkara di atas....

Hearth Of Love

2008-12-18T23:05:00.008+08:00

Love needs an understanding but...not everyone can understand love. Unfortunately some always afraid of getting love and bring nothing only regretness

Love can be weird when we thought it was disappeared and suddenly came to our life but it doesn't mean love can be return in the same language with tender and care. However new unexpected love need some exploration.

Some will expect love high above and yet they don't realise they'll get hurt in return.

And love has been written on fate and they do have another different story.

A note for the one who I really adore

2008-12-16T16:06:00.000+08:00

Semalam saya menemani 'hubby' pergi ke satu perhimpunan untuk menuntut apa yang selama ini dibekukan. Sungguh ramai manusia yang menghadiri perhimpunan tersebut. Mereka mengharapkan perkhabaran gembira tetapi apa yang berlaku ialah sebaliknya. Mungkin mereka merasa kecewa dengan kehilangan sebahagian dari apa yang diharapkan. Apa yang saya dapat rasakan ialah suasana yang asing bagi saya.

Setelah selesai saya menemani 'hubby' ke kampung untuk mengambil barang yang telah dipinjamkan. Sepanjang perjalanan saya melihat sedikit kekeruhan pada riak wajahnya. Tidak banyak perkataan yang terbit dari kami. Dia berada di sebelah saya tapi saya tahu fikiran dia entah melayang ke mana. Perasaan dia sama seperti hujan yang mencurah sepanjang perjalanan kami.

Sayang,

Kita mungkin di uji dengan perkara sebegini dan bukan perkara lain yang mungkin kita tak mampu kita nak menanggungnya. Setiap yang terjadi pasti ada hikmahnya. Setiap yang dijadikan pasti ada sebabnya. There's no such things happened for no reason. Kehidupan kita tak semestinya sempurna. Kita sebagai manusia pun tak pernah sempurna. Saya harap sayang sabar dan tabah. Saya pun sedang belajar apa yang saya tak pernah ada dulu. Sabar ye sayang..... Apa yang sayang harapkan Insya-Allah ada. Hadiah bagi apa yang sayang korbankan pada hari ini.

My doomsday

2008-12-15T13:20:00.003+08:00

When I felt this way

I used to know
WHY I have those kind of feelings
WHAT I really need
WHERE will I be going
WHO I'll speak with
and
WHEN will I be OK

but now.....

I'm stucked. I can't be outside of my own box.

2008-12-10T19:19:00.002+08:00

I am disconnected to the World. Maybe the reason why I don't get you. I am leaving the earth to live another planet.

Thank You

My funny man

2008-12-04T21:14:00.007+08:00

My hubby not familiar to the camera. Susah sangat to see him smile or act silly in front of the camera. I show you this is really surprised me. Here I dont insist him to smile. He did by himself.

Happy weekend darlings. Muahhhsssss...

I have been tagged by my girlfriend

2008-12-04T20:53:00.004+08:00

Dear Shasha,

There you go...

muahhssss

Unagi

2008-12-04T20:13:00.005+08:00

When hubby crave for an eel i brought him to sushi king. I really dont have idea where to bring this man to get some eel because if he buy and bring back the raw eel i dont think i can cook an eel. I can't take it with the smell plus its look like a snake. ehehehhe~~

From my ex-file box, I used to eat an eel once. He did cooked for me and I can't remember how it taste but I can remember how was the eel looks like and how was the smell. So, guys...if u plan for a date and cook together, eel such a very bad idea.

Ayam masak merah

2008-12-04T19:33:00.006+08:00

Hidangan untuk 2-3orang

Bahan A

Bawang merah
Bawang putih
Serai
Halia

Bahan B

Bunga Lawang
Kayu Manis
Biji pelaga

Bahan C

Ayam 600g
Ketang (potong "wedges" dan goreng)
Asam jawa

Tumiskan Bahan A yang telah dikisar dan juga bahan B sehingga garing. Masukkan Air secawan tunggu sehingga mendidih. Setelah mendidih masukkan garam dan gula secukup rasa serta asam jawa yang telah digaul bersama sedikit air. Kemudian masukkan ayam sehingga empok setelah empok dan kuahnya sedikit kering masukkan kentang dan sedia dihidangkan.

When the family and Aliya visit us

2008-12-04T13:25:00.005+08:00

Last Saturday I just moved to a new homey. A few miles from my previous home. Not much different just smaller than my previous one but easier for me to fix my cleaning routine everyday. It's very comfortable for just 2 of us.

Meaning Of Aziyana

2008-11-17T21:43:00.000+08:00

What Aziyana Means

You are usually the best at everything ... you strive for perfection.

You are confident, authoritative, and aggressive.

You have the classic “Type A” personality.

You are incredibly wise and perceptive. You have a lot of life experience.

You are a natural peacemaker, and you are especially good at helping others get along.

But keeping the peace in your own life is not easy. You see things very differently, and it's hard to get you to budge.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.

You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.

You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are a free spirit, and you resent anyone who tries to fence you in.

You are unpredictable, adventurous, and always a little surprising.

You may miss out by not settling down, but you're too busy having fun to care.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.

You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.

You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

Reflection

2008-11-15T12:35:00.007+08:00

When you tell someone the truth maybe they'll shock and crying or totally mad or maybe they'll scream. After that people tend to make decision. Some decision will make by follow their hearth or maybe just for yourself or maybe by the situation itself. How bout the people who suffered because of your decision.

We always rushing for a love, scared of loosing your love, always hoping for love, sacrifice everything we had just for love. How about love being yourself or love to yourself?

As a human being we tend to have a lots of secret. Some of it will affect your emotion and the worst situation will cause your sadness. Some secret better just keep it as a secret and some secret we better not to think at all. However, Its better you keep the secret as a secret because when you tell it out can you bear to handle the situation?

Congratulations!!

2008-11-13T15:01:00.003+08:00

Congratulations to my youngest sister just received her UPSR result. She got straight A's (5A's). Top 4 on the list.

Cool huh~~~

Forgive and Forget

2008-11-12T10:14:00.003+08:00

Jorty stay at my home for a couple of week. I really dont mind since she accompany me while hubby not around. At least I do have some one to talk to laugh.

Forgive and forget that's what they say. Its a good advice but not practical. When someone hurts us we want hurt back. When someone point wrong to us We want to keep right. Without forgiveness old wounds never heels. It just 1 day we're lucky enough to forget.

p/s : Stitch, I,m sorry for your loss. Condolences to you for loosing your sister...

2008-11-10T15:39:00.001+08:00

Saya mungkin tahu kenapa kami tidak dapat apa yang kami mahu. Mungkin Dia mahu kami lebih menghargai anugerah yang bakal di beri. Apa pun saya terima dengan hati yang terbuka.

Kesederhanaan

2008-11-07T12:03:00.003+08:00

Mari lihat sekeliling kita dan muhasabah diri kita pernahkah kita berada di dalam situasi mereka. Cuba kita berfikir di luar kotak situasi. Apakah kemampuan saya jika saya diuji dengan permasalahan atau situasi yang sangat rumit sehingga menggugat kesabaran saya sebagai insan yang lemah.

Saya diuji dan kita sebagai manusia hamba kepada Yang Maha Esa sentiasa diuji. Mungkin kita terlalu taksub mengejar kebahagiaan yang kita inginkan sehingga kita terlupa bersyukur dengan apa yang pernah kita ada.

Walapun pandangan itu datang dari seorang yang kita benci atau mungkin kita rasa tidak layak kerana pernah mengecewakan kita tetapi hakikat tetap tidak akan menipu kita. Pandangan itu perlu kita ambil sebagai pedoman dalam hidup kita untuk membaiki kelemahan diri. Kita boleh belajar kesederhanaan dalam hidup kita.

Mirror mirror

2008-11-06T21:23:00.005+08:00

Kadangkala kita rasa kita sentiasa betul..Berada dalam garisan mengikut ukuran dan garis yang kita lukis sendiri termasuklah mereka yang berada dalam bulatan hidup kita..semua perkara perlulah mengikut apa yang kita fikirkan yang terbaik untuk kita mungkin kita terlalu 'perfectionist' tetapi kita tidak sedar bahawa tidak semua yang kita fikirkan adalah yang terbaik untuk orang lain ataupun terbaik pada mata orang lain....

Kita selalu terbang tinggi sehingga terlupa apa yang ada di bawah. Pada waktu kita jatuh kita mencari orang untuk mengubati luka kita tapi bila kita terbang tinggi lagi masihkah kita pandang pada mereka yang pernah menjadi penawar.Kita ada pada dia bila kita perlu dan hilang bila kita jemu. Kadangkala kita terlalu memikir apa yang kita mahu sampai sanggup kita ketepikan orang lain.

Tidak perlu cemburu sebab kitaran kita di dalam dunia semua sama. Ada yang kita dapat tapi ada yang perlu kita korbankan. Mungkin apa yang ada pada dia tiada pada kita dan mungkin ada pada kita dan tiada pada dia.

Pernahkah anda berada dalam situasi ini?

Jadi fikir fikirkanlah............

Uncle day care

2008-11-06T12:09:00.007+08:00

Last weekend me and hubby get the chance to take care of my niece (in law).

Uncle try to pujuk little Aliya....hahahhahah!!!cute~~~~

My little aliya...tak pe...grab everything as long as "jangan nangis"

My living room where aliya try to kemas...

............

2008-11-03T11:52:00.003+08:00

Just came back from kampong to settle some of issues. I met Jorty last nite at Asia Cafe. Brought her some sayur-sayur kampong and banana. Reach home almost 1am Letih sangat I woke up almost at 11 and to be surprised hubby woke me up for subuh which was my job everyday.

Things to do in November
- Settle some hubby's family issues
- Starts to stay alone on Friday night because hubby have class for 6 month
- Moving out very soon within this month
- wedding's invitation in Tapah (hubby's classmate)
- Hunting for a job

New baby born

2008-10-29T11:27:00.002+08:00

Congratulation to Sarah Said for her new baby born. Muhammad Iffad.

My birthday post

2008-10-21T16:01:00.003+08:00

Happy Birthday to me
officially turned to 26 yesterday.
My life's partner trying to be romantic gave a 2 chocolates, 6 red and pink roses. Good try actually because I really love it.
26 just a number which you count everyday. He jealous much when his friend's children called him pakcik but they called me kakak instead calling me auntie or makcik. I'm happy!!!

Raya raya raya

2008-10-07T09:57:00.003+08:00

Home sweet home...
came back from JB last friday night straightly went back to Sekinchan and finnaly balik rumah ku yang terchenta.
Raya tahun ni best la juga sebab ada ahli baru iaitu suamiku
Tak la janggal sangat sebab dia dibesarkan dengan keluarga jawa so, takla janggal sangat dengan culture ku.

Benda yang best sangat:-
==> dapat minta maaf dengan mak ayah dan mak abah juga
==> Bagi adek adek cucu cicit nenek tompok duit raya
==> dapat jumpa nenek, makcik pakcik yang sangat havoc. jumpa alyn, rean, kak liza, fir, bina mat li dan semua cucu cicit nenek tompok yang chomel dan tampan belaka.

tapi ada juga yang tak best
==> Kat kampong mak memang panas sejak dari azali. macam dalam oven and hubby admit memang sangat panas. Plus saya sangat sangap la tak dapat 2 C's. Apa dia? kui kui kui...ada la....

Walaupun ni dah raya ke 5 saya nak ucapkan Selamat Hari Raya kat semua rakan rakan yang terchenta serta saudara mara yang sangat saya sayangi.
Maafkan la segala salah silap saya sama ada saya sengaja ataupun tidak sengaja.

Muahhhhhssss.....

My guilty

2008-09-26T09:13:00.003+08:00

- Rasa tak best hari ni. Not in the mood. Feeling guilty sebab smalam terpecahkan hubby's facial foam. It cost him RM 128.

- Today I saw my neighbour packed their things for balik kampong. Best nye kan. Rasa macam tak sabar la pulak nak balik Johor.

- Rasa excited nak raya sebab semua preparation raya dah ready tapi simple aje la.

- Try to pujuk hubby to get another 1 baju raya. Yeay yeay esok shopping baju kat Sungai Besar. Seriously sangat murah ready made baju raya cost you only RM 50 gile tak murah. As If I know la kan saya dah buat business dah for raya.

P/s : Happy weekend darling...muahhhhssss

Are You?

2008-09-18T13:31:00.002+08:00

Me really miss my hometown. I tought I can come back Jb earlier than what we'd plan but hubby said "kita balik sekinchan dulu"

Owh ya....soalan favourite yg saya kene sediakan jawapan nya ialah

"dah wek wek blm?" or
"dah ada isi ke blm?" or
"dah preggy dlm?"

I just need my time framed for my readiness. For a time being me are not ready yet. Still in the mood nak manja manja....

Stolen

2008-09-11T10:15:00.003+08:00

Hubby lappy has been stolen yesterday. We only realise after we came back from work around 7pm. Frust sangat. Ada orang pecah masuk. My leg was shaking because in my mind I was thinking of penchuri yang sangat ganas. Hubby checked on security guard and after breakfast he went to police report.

I'm scared...He left me at home when he went to police station Bukit Raja from 8am till 11.30pm. lama kan???

Sudah banyak saya dengar kes-kes pecah rumah time bulan puasa ni. Maybe sebab ekonomi sekarang kot semua barang naik. Dah nak raya lagi la. Everyone desperate for money.

Dah la tengah susah lappy plak hilang. Macam dah jatuh kena timpa tangga pulak. Dugaan kan.... Nak buat macam mana.....Sabar je la......

Hubby plan to move. Might be at new JKR kuarters in Shah Alam and he's waiting for an offer. Hopefully dapat la so, I dont have to pay for house rental. Dah laki gue Ikot je la.....

Matahariku

2008-09-03T12:12:00.001+08:00

tertutup sudah pintu, pintu hatiku
yang pernah dibuka waktu, hanya untukmu
kini kau pergi dari hidupku
ku harus relakanmu walau aku tak mau

berjuta warna pelangi di dalam hati
sejenak luluh bergeming menjauh pergi
tak ada lagi cahaya suci
semua nada beranjak, aku terdiam sepi

dengarlah matahariku suara tangisanku
ku bersedih karna panah cinta menusuk jantungku
ucapkan matahariku puisi tentang hidupku
tentangku yang tak mampu melakukan waktu

berjuta warna pelangi di dalam hati
sejenak luluh bergeming menjauh pergi
tak ada lagi cahaya suci
semua nada beranjak, aku terdiam sepi

dengarkanlah kau matahariku

dengarlah matahariku suara tangisanku
ku bersedih karna panah cinta menusuk jantungku

dengarlah matahariku suara tangisanku
ku bersedih karna panah cinta menusuk jantungku
ucapkan matahariku puisi tentang hidupku
tentangku yang tak mampu melakukan waktu

Ayat ayat cinta

2008-09-02T10:13:00.002+08:00

Desir pasir di padang tandus
Segar sang pemikiran hati
Terkisah ku di antara
Cinta yang rumit

Bila keyakinanku datang
Kasih bukan sekedar cinta
Pengorbanan cinta yang agung Kupertaruhkan
Maafkan bila ku tak sempurna

Cinta ini tak mungkin ku cegah
Ayat-ayat cinta bercerita
Cintaku padamu
Bila bahagia mulai menyentuh

Seakan ku bisa hidup lebih lama
Namun harus kutinggalkan cinta
Ketika ku bersujud

Sigh~~

2008-08-29T17:35:00.004+08:00

Rasa mcm nak give up je. Travel everyday KL-Klang pastu at least 3hours standing kat dlm train. This morning penuh sangat2 pastu panas. Tension sangat.

I really dont understand why a particular someone tak faham faham kenapa saya sangat letih. I woke up at 5.30am every weekday, cooked for breakfast for him and my lunch box and came back at home almost 8pm. Penat. Letih. Sometimes balik rumah semua dah settle tp selalunya kena masak for dinner. Sampai 1 masa muka saya sangat pucat mcm mayat. Tapi adakah dia sedar? Sebab he keep on asking me knp lately saya asyik penat.

I did everything and dont expect to get in return dan hari ini I need a favor itu pun banyak sangat quiry. Saya dah sangat bosan dan fed up. Urghhhh!!!

Best sangat......

2008-08-27T22:20:00.003+08:00

Next week dah start puasa. My first Ramadhan with hubby and my new family. we already devide our role as hubby n wife time bulan puasa. Kalau semua saya buat sure la terpengsan kan. Nasib baik la saya dapat dia walaupun hidup kami tak senang dan semewah dulu tapi dia sentiasa cuba memahami saya. Betul la kata salah seorang dari sahabat saya. There's something you win and loose.

Last saturday me having dinner with my best girlfriend and hubby. makan-makan. chit chat and........watched SATC. Lega sangat2. Thanks sangat kat kawan saya yang sudi datang rumah saya dan menonton bersama-sama. Best tau. Nanti we plan makan buka puasa kat rumah Jawrty. Dah lama tak rasa dia masak plus ada org tu owe me 1 cook. Dah bertahun tahun dah saya request tp tak dapat lagi. hehehehee....

Saya sangat hargai masa kita bersama-sama macam dulu walaupun saya sudah ada handbag yang saya perlu kepit setiap hari. kui kui kui............

==(^"^)==

2008-08-02T11:57:00.003+08:00

At last I have my weekend at home. Mr hubby went to work after had our weekend breakfast. Thinking about my girlfriends were on vacation. sure seronok. Have fun my darlings...
Craving banana with peanut butter sandwich toast. Sure sedap kan???Last week I bought avocado at pasar malam and suprised me it was damn cheap RM 6 for 1kg it was even chearper than kat cameron highland.
Saya sangat rindukan kawan kawan saya.......

Owh...I feel dizzy since yesterday....takkan minum teh O pun rasa dizzy. tak best nya.

P/S: Happy birthday darling Jawrty wish you for good wealth, health and love. Muahhhhhsssss......

Masam masam manis

2008-07-21T21:48:00.004+08:00

He just came back and luckily he forgot where did he place his house keys so, he decided to fetch me at the KTM station. Bestnye....balik kije dpt tgk muka dia. rindu wooooo~~~kui kui kui....

Dalam Air Kuterbayang Wajah - P.Ramlee Saloma
=============================================

Dalam air ku terbayang wajah
Adikku yang ku puja
Tenteram semula hati gundah
Dapat mambang indah

Di ingatan ku terlukis wajah
Abang ku yang gagah
Baik budi serta ramah tamah
Handsome macam gajah

Rasa di hati masam-masam manis
Rindu asmara

Kanda ku jangan nangis
Hilang rupa lawa
Timbul rupa naga

Kalau hidup tak begurau senda
Hilang nikmat cinta
Bila rindu mendebarkan dada
Tahan nafas sahaja

Kalau hidup tak bergurau senda
Hilang nikmat cinta
Bila rindu mendebarkan dada
Sembunyi bawah tangga

While lonely bugging me

2008-07-19T22:32:00.005+08:00

Uuuuwwwhhh...I miss him badly. He didn't called me last nite. Sob..sob....

I have a chit chatty with Mr. Engineer and glad to know he's having a new girlfriend who mix Germany and Indon. Its reminds me of beautiful actress Maya Karin and my best girlfriend Shabana Maneesa. He'll away to Milan visit girlfriend and girlfriend's mother.

My mother in-law keep on calling me. She was worried since I stay alone at home. Dia sangat mengambil berat kerana saya adalah seorang yang sangat penakut di dalam dunia ini. She's offering to accompany me while hubby not at home tapi rasa macam menyusahkan je.

I felt very lonely and sad. Rasa sebak je time malam. I always sat beside him and lie down on his lappy. I can feel his hand. Boleh menyorok under his arms time tgk cerita seram.

Saya masih menanti dia untuk menghubungi saya.

Sob..sob...sob....

2008-07-18T23:36:00.003+08:00

1. sedih coz my love one went away from me for few days. I felt lonely. Tak Boleh Call. tak boleh dengar suara...semua tak boleh....(Sayang...cepatla balik)

2. My whole day was tiring me. My second day at work full of gossip and compalining. Sometimes I don't see anything wrong your races but people do care about your attitudes.

3. Me still waiting a call from him. Sedih la dah 11.45 pun dia tak call. Supposely according to his schedule 11.30 dah habis dah session for today. I miss him. Rasa macam nak demam plak la...Rindu...

4. I have a second tought nak g interview esok. Macam tak larat post dia kat Klang tapi I have to menapak ke KL sana.

5. What shall I do during my weekend without him? Boring kan....Boring la....iskkk...Boringnya....balik la cepat....nak termati ni....cepat la cepat la.....

6. zzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz........

An Offer

2008-07-14T14:25:00.002+08:00

Me will start new work this saturday at KLCC. All under 1 roof me, shawrty and jawrty. Waiting a call from HR division regarding the package and remuneration. Start a hectic life. Sure penat gile.....

Hmmmm....boring...

Apologies.....

2008-07-11T11:16:00.003+08:00

me sacrifice my SATC nite because of him.
The night me waiting for all these while since I heard they'll screen it out.
My heart is shatter. Sedih....tp nak buat mcmana............

The Heart of the Matter

2008-07-10T14:40:00.001+08:00

I got the call today, I didn't wanna hear
But I knew that it would come
An old true friend of ours was talkin' on the phone
She said you found someone
And I thought of all the bad luck,
And all the struggles we went through
How I lost me and you lost you
What are these voices outside love's open door
Make us throw off our contentment
And beg for something more?

I've been learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning them again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter

But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

These times are so uncertain
There's a yearning undefined
And people filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
And the trust and self-assurance that lead to happiness
They're the very things we kill, I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
And the work they put between us,
You know it doesn't keep us warm

I've been trying to live without you now
But I miss you, baby
The more I know, the less I understand
And all the things I thought I figured out, I have to learn again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my heart is so shattered
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

All the people in your life who've come and gone
They let you down, you know they hurt your pride
Better put it all behind you; cause life goes on
You keep carrin' that anger, it'll eat you up inside

I wanna be happily everafter
And my heart is so shattered
But I know it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
Because the flesh will get weak
And the ashes will scatter
So I'm thinkin' about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if you don't love me anymore
Even if you don't love me anymore